Apparently Masturbation Will Impregnate Your Hands In The Afterlife, Turk Islamic Scholar

asfasfsafsaThe man in question is Mücahid Cihad Han, an Istanbul preacher who has a YouTube channel he uses to spread the word of God. Mücahid made his outlandish claims during an appearance on the 2000 TV channel. A member of the public called into the show to admit to masturbating, despite being happily married. My question is: when did those things become mutually exclusive?

Anyway, I digress. The caller also admitted to touching his happy place on his pilgrimage to Mecca. Our preacher friend responded by saying that masturbating is “haram” (against the will of God) and that his pregnant hands will demand rights in the afterlife. “If our viewer was single, I could recommend he marry, but what can I say now?” he said, before extolling the virtue of resisting “Satan’s temptations.”
In short, Mücahid Cihad Han thinks that there are lots of little infidel hand babies running around in heaven (that’s if you naughty f***ers even make it through the pearly gates) – which is all sorts of messed up. Can someone sit Mücahid down and give him a talk about the birds and the bees? Maybe then he’ll stop trying to rub out the art of rubbing one out.